Best way to take care of young children? Why not make your own recipe : )
- Frédérique and the Wooden Fellows
Have you ever wondered what is the best way to take care of young children? How to raise your own children or interact with them as a professional or community member?
The bad news? There is no one-size-fits-all answer.
The good news? There is no one-size-fits-all answer!
It is good news, indeed, as it reduces the pressure we sometimes put on ourselves, and the idea we may mess up the entire life of a child based on one single decision : ) We, nowadays, have easy access to many resources, from professionals sharing research-based tips to educators reflecting on their classroom practices, to parents posting their daily life online. Sometimes, too many resources. In addition, in a society where recognition often comes from elevating our own work rather than others, resources may highlight only one “best” way: homeschool vs. preschool, Montessori vs. Waldorf, play-based vs. academic-focus, etc.
Our advice? Why not make your own recipe! Browse a wide range of resources, read, listen to podcasts, seek help, and trust your instinct. Most importantly, take some time to slow down, spend time with the young child(ren) around you, listen, and learn from them.
Today, the wooden Fellows and I are sharing our own “recipe”, with three “cooking” books that caught our attention recently. We are, indeed, continuously adjusting our ingredients, and we hope our post will inspire you to do the same.
Taking care of young children with a "dash of" biology ...
I studied and worked in biology before transitioning into early education 15+ years ago. Hence, I always keep in mind that young children are, first and foremost, human beings—shaped by their genes, nutrition, and need for rest. Play-based learning is fantastic, but cannot work on an empty stomach. The biology of children’s brains and bodies needs to be nourished first.
The Whole-Brain Child by Siegel and Bryson offered a fascinating perspective on how children’s brains work. The authors, for instance, explain the connection between the child’s emotional right brain and their logical left brain. I found their approach to handling upset children—connecting with them first—particularly refreshing. How many of us have felt helpless with an angry child? It’s a great reminder that sometimes, a hug and emotional connection can work wonders, far more than raising our voices or responding with frustration. It’s a great lesson in parenting—and in life—empathy first.
... "a bouquet garni of" culture ...
We all come from different backgrounds, shaped by our heritage and culture, influencing who we are, our beliefs, and our values. Recognizing these cultural influences—what matters to us and what may clash with our society—is crucial, especially in parenting and education. Personally, growing up in France but raising my children in the U.S. has given me numerous moments of reflection. For instance, I taught Rosie how to write in cursive at a young age because it is what we do in France, cursive being more natural, and closer to scribble for young children. One day, Rosie came home from school and told me that she was told not to write in cursive. After talking with the teacher, I learned there had been a misunderstanding about Rosie’s attention. Still, this situation reminded me how important it is to communicate openly and listen actively. It also reminded me to stand up for what I value.
Sometimes, though, it is easy to mistake cultural differences for struggles in parenting (or, more generally, in engaging with young children).
Bringing up Bébé, by Druckerman, was quite refreshing to read. The author is an American journalist who raised her children in Paris, France, and offered a perspective that felt relatable. I deeply value the uniqueness of young children, but more importantly, the uniqueness of everyone. Hence, I have always found it difficult to generalize the “American way” versus the “French way”. The author did a great job, though, raising some key differences between, as she define it, middle-class American and French parents. It has made me think: when I feel “counter-current” with my environment, where does it come from? Genuine struggles? My French upbringing? This is the benefit of being bicultural—we can embrace the best of both sides. But it does come with its own challenges.
... and practical suggestions "on the fly"
I am always eager to read books that offer practical, research-based advice—comprehensive yet quick and easy to apply.
Zero to Five, by Cutchlow, was another refreshing read. As an early childhood educator, I have read a plethora of books about early childhood education, often organized by areas of child development — physical, cognitive, etc. This book felt different, though, as it is organized around relatable topics like “Love” and “Connect.” The book even includes a “Slow down” section, a gentle reminder to pause, reflect, and take our time, which resonates with some of our previous posts, such as why we should all take the time to listen to young children. The sub header “what I have learned so far” is well aligned with our beliefs. Educating young children is a journey, indeed, isn’t it? The more we learn and stay curious, the more we grow, and this book offers matters to reflect on what works best for us. Or not.
The wooden Fellows and I hope sharing our own recipes will inspire you to reflect on yours! What additional ingredients would you add?
As always, thank you for being here and reading our words.